(Summer 2003, Oregon) There was no media coverage on this one. I was a
witness and rescuer. Around 7AM, I looked up from the machine I was
operating at work, and saw an older Nissan at the stop sign across the
street. Its emergency flashers were on. A heavyset young woman emerged,
opened the hood, and leaned in to manipulate something inside. Suddenly
the car lurched forward, knocking her down.
I immediately ran for the door. By the time I started across the parking
lot, the bumper of the car was slowly shoving her out into the four-lane
boulevard! The situation reminded me of the Steven King story where the
car starts trying to kill people. If she had been thinner, the car would
have rolled over her, making her a true Darwin nominee. Unsuccessful at
crushing her, the woman's car was pushing her into the boulevard's right
lane, where other cars could finish the job.
After checking for traffic, I ran across the street to help. Very
fortunately for her, the driver of the next vehicle to approach her (a
school bus) was quick-witted enough to turn on the flashing red lights,
stopping traffic.
As I sprinted to the driver's door, I remember feeling a flash of
irritation as the woman gasped to me, "Put it in reverse." Did she think I
was going to try to lift it off her? I hopped in and carefully reversed the
car. She stood up, brushed herself off, and said, "Stupid car. The
transmission linkage is always sticking."
Dumbfounded, all I could think of to say was, "Maybe you should set the
parking brake next time." I consciously didn't say, "The car is
stupid?"
DarwinAwards.com © 1994 - 2020
Submitted by: John Hancock
Reference: Eyewitness Account
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